REPENT, AND YE SHALL BE SAVED

Today, as i was walking on campus, every street corner was littered with evangelists passing out free bibles. I noticed that the only people handing them out were men in suits that looked to be at least seventy years of age. I thought that perhaps organized religion is in a decline, This is evident in the decline in people entering the seminary in recent years, especially catholicism. Hell, thats a huge reason why they keep recycling the pedophiles they have installed in parishes right now. Theyre low on warm bodies. Perhaps there are no young people in the church, and the whole purpose of this venture was to breathe some new life into it. Then I thought that maybe the church used the older members because they look pathetic and sad and people would feel sorry for them and take a bible. I didnt really reach a conclusion. Every time one of the geriatric evangelists would offer me a bible, I would pat the pack of cigarettes in my pocket that was roughly the same shape as the mini bibles they were handing out, and tell them I already had one. Finally, I asked one of them what church they came from and he told me it was the second church of something or other. Then, he proceeded to tell me that I should visit, or if I was interested he could arrange for one of them to come to my house to try and save me from my transgressions. I thought about that for a second, exploring the possibilities of how I could have fun with that. One of said possibilities included inviting them in to my living room, and holding the conversation with shemale porn playing on the TV. I decided against it, because porn gags are played out. That, and i didnt want to be responsible for one of these people having a coronary.

I realize that this entry in my weblog does not contain the kind of humor that many of you are accustomed to. However, I find organized religion pretty humorous in itself, and well, its my blog, so deal with it.